My Letter to the State of Pennsylvania

Dear State of Pennsylvania,

As you know, you and I have a very love-hate relationship with one another. And we might as well be honest... most times it's hate-hate. I can recall the first time I met you, driving all the way here from Texas only to realize I was moving to the center of nowhere. Clearly, when I saw the sign that said "End of Freeway," I should have known better and turned right around back for The Great State. But no, I thought, I should give PA a chance. Perhaps first impressions are misleading.

I was wrong.

In the FIVE years I have lived here in PA you have taught me one lesson that I know I will never, ever forget: other states are WAY better than this one will ever be. Although I admire your lack of fear in openly declaring your affinity for the Democratic Party, this somehow seems minor in comparison to the blatant disregard for road construction in this state. I can name multiple highways that have probably been under construction for years... at least five that I can personally attest to! I have seen 322 approach completion, only to be torn up again. I have yet to see I99 make ANY DECENT PROGRESS whatsoever! The one question I'd like to know the answer to is, will these roads ever be finished? Hardly! As soon as those two are done, I'm sure it would be worthwhile for someone to start working on I80, which is in worse shape than either of the two highways mentioned previously!

I am tired of knowing that to get to Happy Valley, there is ONE road IN and ONE road out. That's crap. Thanks to you dear Pennsylvania, I will NEVER look for a job in a town that is solely dependent on a university for its survival. IT JUST ISN'T WORTH IT. Thanks to you Pennsylvania, I am looking for jobs SOUTH of the Mason-Dixon line, when in reality, states like NY, CT, MA and I'm sure others don't really seem that bad. But thanks to you, I'm not even going to consider them. Thanks to you Pennsylvania, I have come to realize that people didn't really like each other when they were trying to figure out places to settle. Whose idea was it to put this town in the center of a damn valley? It's colder, snows and rains more, and no one that works here in town can really afford to live here. Let's face it. Here in this state, you either live in a rural area in the middle of nowhere where no one can get to you, or you're in some urban place where no one can get to you... or really wants to because it's just ghetto.

Pennsylvania, as much as I dislike you right now, I have to admit you have brought good things to my life. Good friends (who most of which aren't from here-- go figure!), good beer (hooray for Otto's-- if not for you, life would be a lot harder and way more sober), and seasons. I have to admit, there's nothing like driving along and actually witnessing what fall looks like. Too bad that somewhere in the back of my mind, I believe that it's highly overrated. Winter alone is enough to make you see that there are better things than fall out there.

Pennsylvania, you tried your best. It's not your fault that a bunch of inefficient politicians were elected and figured that having no sales-tax was better than having roads without pot-holes. And it's too bad that those same stinking politicians want to nickel and dime every citizen of this state to death... whether through state or borough taxes. Additionally, it's too bad that they also can't tolerate poor people, whether in the ghetto or in the trailer park-- someone's got to go.

So thanks for nothing Pennsylvania.

Sincerely,

~A disgruntled Texan